Ordinary Life, Extraordinary Living

Are You Preparing For Your Own Demise?

That sounds worse than I really intend it to. What triggered that thought was an article from the Wall Street Journal, titled "Netflix Boss Plots Life After DVD." Quoting from the article:

"...Netflix's chief executive officer, Reed Hastings, thinks his core business is doomed. As soon as four years from now, he predicts, the business that generates most of Netflix's revenue today will begin to decline, as DVDs delivered by mail steadily lose ground to movies sent straight from the Internet.....His position offers a rare look at how a CEO manages a still-hot business as its time runs out. "Almost no companies succeed at what we're doing," he says."

A couple of years ago, I blogged about how a management guru had used sigmoid curves to explain the same predicament for all businesses. Companies ride a natural wave of ascending and descending but usually don't take heed until too far into the descent (think newspapers.)

Photo by ODHD

The same goes for careers. Most people wait until the "arc" of a first career is nearly done before taking steps to plant the seeds for the next career. We can easily get caught up in the soothing blanket of success and not realize that time is running out. Time could be running out due to changes in technology, a whole industry, or just what gives you joy when you get up in the morning. In any case, pay attention, so that you won't be caught flat-footed.

Where are you on the arc of your career? 

Perspective on Bad Times

 When people ask me about my work history, I talk about my first job out of school, in 1983, working in a nuclear power plant.  I talk about the experience of working in a heavily unionized, male-dominated environment, and walking to my office in the middle of the plant with a hardhat and steel-toed shoes on.

Photo by Paul J.

What I don't talk about is just as important. I don't talk about having only one job offer that year, even though I graduated in the top 10% of my engineering class from a top-notch private university. I don't talk about seeing a majority of my classmates scrambling to find jobs that year. I don't talk about commuting 40 miles each way to work to a small town 60 miles outside of Chicago, in the middle of nowhere.

Why don't I talk about these things? Because I've forgotten what it was like. I just did it, lived through it, and moved on. I didn't know things were "bad, really bad." I just knew it was hard to find a job and I would have to make some sacrifices in terms of location.

1983 is often put up as comparison for what we are going through now. ("We haven't seen numbers like this since the last recession in 1983.") But if someone hadn't reminded me that the economy was bad in 1983, I wouldn't have known.

This is not a "I walked ten miles to school and you should be able to do it, too" story. But it is meant to give one perspective on bad times. We live through them and forget what it was like, not because our memories are that bad (although mine is getting worse with age), but because it's human nature to focus on today and last week and last month. Photo by aflcio2008

Yes, times are bad. Mainly because we have only today and yesterday and last month to think about. Did we make great strides in the last 25 years, since 1983? Yes. Are we still living in one of the most affluent societies (I'm talking about first world countries around the globe) that mankind has ever known? Yes. Do I feel lucky to be where I'm at today? Yes, absolutely.

The next time I hear someone talk about how bad things are, I'll just close my eyes and think of 1983.

How Good Are You at Self-Advocacy?

It's been awhile since I posted here. I've been learning about advocacy and self-advocacy. 

In preparing for a talk in Houston next week for the Juvenile Arthritis annual conference, I looked up the definition of "advocate." (The title of my talk is "Advocacy: Finding Your Voice." Contact me if you are in Houston and you want to meet for drinks while I'm in town.)  Photo by Leonid Mamchenkov.

Here's what Webster's says about advocates:

1. one that pleads the cause of another
2. one that defends or maintains a cause or proposal
3. one that supports or promotes the interests of another

As a coach, I sometimes play the role of an advocate for the client. One way of being an advocate is crafting a confidentiality agreement between a client and the person who is hiring me (e.g., a manager, parent, or even son/daughter) so that the client has as much freedom to express himself during the coaching, without worries that it will get back to a third party. 

But more often, I'm an advocate for the client by helping their best self to emerge. People have many "selves," not all of which are helpful in every situation. In fact, many of us have a self that tells us we are not good enough, don't have permission to do what brings us joy, aren't entitled to things that we would easily accord our spouse or favorite pet, and basically criticizes our every move.  I'm learning there's a name for this: Negative Ego. (Many thanks to Keri Kuerbis Lehman for deepening my understanding of this concept.) Photo by hi, i'm sammmm

Clients need an advocate when their Negative Ego starts running the show. 

Even better than being an advocate is helping clients to develop self-advocacy. It's the difference between "giving fish" and "teaching to fish."  I can be there during a coaching session to beat back someone's Negative Ego. But the client is much more empowered when she can do it for herself.

I'm working on this for myself. I was recently coached at a time when my Negative Ego was screaming: "You don't have time to waste!  Keep working or you'll never get it all done!  Forget about that bike ride on Sundays with Evelyn. I'll be sure to make you pay for the afternoon you took off last Friday." And on and on....you know those voices, right?

My coach simply said, "You can have it any way you want." She was telling me that my sense of urgency was an illusion.  Which made me think about, "What would happen if I don't get X, Y, and Z done by next month?"  The consequences didn't seem so bad. And it made my life not just a whole lot easier, but more manageable and sane.  That was advocacy. Photo by Matter=Energy.

Self-advocacy is hearing the voice that doesn't serve me, and saying, "It's a lie! It's a f---ing lie!" Now that would be a bit harder. But it's where I want to go and where I want my clients to go. 

How good are you at self-advocacy? And how do you celebrate when you are successful at self-advocacy? 

Standing Up to the Bullies (With Kindness)

In the course of making a living, it's easy to compromise our values and principles. Think of the client you don't want to offend or the VP who treats you and rest of the staff as part of her fiefdom.

The most precious thing that you have is your self-respect and dignity.  Others may try to strip you of it, but only you can give it away.

Viktor Frankel showed the power of this in his remarkable book, Man's Search for Meaning, where he wrote about his experience in a concentration camp during World War II. By most standards, Frankel had nothing. The Nazis had taken away all material goods, the manuscript to a book that he had been working on, his freedom, and his family. Yet he still possessed a few things that really matter, especially under such bleak circumstances. He kept his dignity, self-respect, imagination, and humanity.

I can't stand bullies--people who take advantage of a situation, such as having more stature in a community or positional authority in an organization or holding the purse strings (or in grade school, being bigger and older.) Bullies may make unreasonable demands or undermine your self-esteem. In all cases, they ignore clear boundaries. They cross the line, sometimes repeatedly. Photo by kevindooley.

When I was in kindergarten, I was walking home from school. A boy pushed me into a mud puddle. I remember my red wool sweater, knit by my mother, dirty and wet. I cried all the way home.

I've never forgotten that feeling.

There would be times as an adult when others bullied me. More often than not, I didn't say anything.  This took the form of lewd remarks in an environment hostile to women, or practical jokes that went too far. I let them strip away my dignity, by not saying anything, by not standing up for myself.

In my thirties, I started to find my voice and with that, stand up to the bullies. A few days after giving birth to my first son, with hormones raging, I received a call from the person who took over my duties at work, asking a few reasonable questions. On the second call, I realized this person wasn't going to take heed of the boundaries that I had set up for my maternity leave. I called my manager and complained. He apologized and made sure I never received another call during my leave.

Photo by Eddie~S

In my forties, in starting my own business, I ran into plenty of bullies --from clients to colleagues to business contacts.  In some cases, I had the courage to address the bully immediately. In other cases, it took longer.

Several years ago, I met with three men who were in a business partnership. One man, who didn't feel that he was being treated fairly by the other two, brought me in as a potential coach/consultant. He wanted to create a more equitable partnership. After some complimentary work, the three men got excited about what was possible in working with me. We started talking about how often to meet and when we could get started, items that would later be confirmed in a proposal.

The alpha male, the one clearly in charge, made an off-hand remark that made me uncomfortable. It was not only sexist. It was designed to strip me of my dignity, disguised as a joke. I stopped in my tracks and simply said, "I'm feeling uncomfortable and I don't want to work with you. Thank you for your time." Afterwards, the two other men called to apologize and asked me to re-consider. The offending alpha male never contacted me. I referred the other two men to a colleague.

More recently, I woke up with this internal message from my wisest self, "Be kind to yourself and to others." I realized it fit perfectly when I read an email, from a potential client, who attempted to bully me. Apparently nice people who don't get their way make the worst bullies. It's unseemly.

I was kind to myself. I gave myself permission to get smarter and disengage from working for this person. I was kind to the potential client by not lashing out, but rather saying simply, there wasn't a fit.

I used to think that standing up for myself meant that I had to get angry, like when I called my manager while on maternity leave. Now I know that holding my ground, when the line is crossed, can be done firmly and yes, with kindness, for all involved. 

How do you stand up to bullies?

Divine Timing

Recently, I've been playing with the notion of "divine timing." It's the idea that everything happens at the exact right time, that nothing has to be forced or rushed. Divine timing doesn't necessarily mean slower,  unless that's where my energy is naturally taking me. Just as often, things happen faster, like when I pick my spots to write a blog post and it comes pouring out of me. Divine timing is knowing when that exact right time is, not from looking at a clock, but by feeling it.  Photo by fdecomite

I was first made aware of this special relationship with time when I was working with a client in front of another coach, to get feedback on my coaching. I was to coach my client for no more than fifteen minutes and was given the opportunity for a "two-minute" warning when my time would be up. I declined that option, relying on my own internal clock. No sooner had I wrapped up the coaching then I heard, "That was exactly 15 minutes!" This has happened more than once.

Divine timing is waking up in the morning or after a cat nap, at exactly the time I wanted to wake up, without an alarm clock. Photo by Michael Fillion

Divine timing is meeting strangers at just the right time. Often they are able to help me with an issue I'm struggling with at the moment. Last week, I asked for advice on Twitter, about choosing a webinar service. A partner in a start-up, specializing in support for webinars, saw my tweet and responded immediately.  We scheduled time to talk the next day and 90 minutes into the call, we still had more to talk about. It was only by coincidence that he had searched on Twitter with keywords that matched my tweet, just a few moments after I posted my request. He joked that if there had been something good on television that night, he never would have seen my tweet!

Divine timing is re-connecting with friends at the most opportune times, for me and for them. A friend emailed me about getting together, after I delayed getting together last month. On the day her email arrived,  I noticed that I was attending a networking meeting that evening and invited her to attend as well. Later, I found out it was exactly what she needed in the moment, to get her bearings again after a hard week.  Photo by glennharper

Diving timing is when a client calls a few minutes late, just enough time for me to grab lunch or get settled in after coming home from a business appointment.

Divine timing is delaying working on a project until just the right moment, not because I'm procrastinating, but because it hasn't yet been "fully cooked."  This could be working with an attorney on a trademark, or with a graphic designer on a logo, or working with a possible collaborator for a speaking engagement.  In all of those cases, I knew when the time was right to dig in and when I could allow things to develop further before spending time and energy.  Photo by thunderchild tm

Divine timing is contacting a prospective client about a proposal, getting to the root of why it's been taking so long to get a decision made, and then offering up as a reference a repeat customer who had just contacted me that morning and had all the right credentials  to address the prospective client's concerns.

Diving timing means I no longer worry about being late or behind. I pay attention to when my energy is right for tackling the task at hand and go with it. I trust my sense of timing, knowing when it's time to work on each item on my to-do list, because it becomes present for me.

Divine timing is all about trusting the moment, whatever that looks like, and letting my energy guide me. Life is a lot easier since I've become aware of divine timing. Delays and reschedules don't bother me when I know there's a better time for whatever I was going to do. Photo by R'eyes

Do you experience divine timing? If so, what does it look like for you?

Leaving a Steady Paycheck to Be An Entrepreneur

Someone recently posed these questions to me:

"If you didn't have the means (financially) by which to pursue an entrepreneur's lifestyle and build your own business, would you still do it?"

"If you still worked for a corporation, would you still pursue an entrepreneur's lifestyle and build your own business?"

Photo by divemasterking2000

I've been pondering these two questions for the last few days.  The short answer: Yes and maybe.

While the general population asks:

"What do I currently have that I would be at risk of losing?"

Most entrepreneurs are driven by:

"What do I stand to gain that I currently don't have?"

The difference in mindset is striking, isn't it?  You could sum it up with the polarity of Scarcity vs. Abundance thinking. I think that would be glib. There's more to it than that.

When I started my business in 2003, my husband, who manages our finances said to me, "We have enough to live on for 2-3 years. Focus on building your business and we'll do just fine."  That timeframe included burning through our 401K savings, which many people consider untouchable until retirement.

Would I have still started a business in 2003 after getting laid off, if my husband hadn't reassured me on the financial front?  Yes, absolutely.

The financial cushion made it easier, because it gave me more time to build my business.  But I would have made the leap to self-employment anyway. Why? Because my drive to gain what I didn't have as an employee--full creative expression, control of my own destiny, the satisfaction of matching my gifts and talents with the marketplace needs, and freedom, sweet freedom--overshadowed any fear I had of losing what I had at the time. My nod to less money in the bank: I would have been more aggressive in creating a revenue stream from the get-go.

Photo by ClickFlashPhotos

In fact, other than money in a 401K, I didn't have much to lose when I started my business 6 years ago. I didn't have a job. I didn't have status. (When you are unemployed, you automatically lose status, no matter what title you held previously). I didn't feel that I was at risk of losing my identity, as I had been transitioning out of engineering for a couple of years by then.

As with many other things, YMMV (your mileage may vary). If you require a bank loan to start up your business, are you willing to lose your credit worthiness if things don't work out? If you're used to a certain standard of living (e.g., vacations abroad, expensive dinners out), are you willing to change your lifestyle?  If you have two kids in college, are you willing to have a family discussion on alternative ways to fund their education?  If you have a spouse who is not supportive of hanging out your shingle, are you willing to work through the consequences?  None of these were issues for me, but they may be for you.

Another way to look at this decision of becoming an entrepreneur:

What's the opportunity cost?  

If I stick with being an employee, what will it cost me in terms of professional growth, satisfaction, new relationships, personal development, lifestyle, and yes, money over the long term? 

Not everyone is cut out to be an entrepreneur. If you have even the slightest inkling that running your own show is something you would enjoy, you owe it to yourself to consider the opportunity cost of staying with the status quo. I'm fond of saying to individuals who are on the fence to committing and moving into action on something important to them,

"You don't have time to waste."

My friend, Ilene, taught me that lesson. Before she died in 2006 of ALS (aka Lou Gehrig's disease), she relayed a story of training new coaches and watching their reaction to her deteriorating sense of balance and strength in her legs. She proclaimed wisely, "I'm the lucky one. I know that my time is limited. You are still under the illusion that you have all the time in the world." How true, dear Ilene. How true. Photo by littledan77

I'd like to expand on my answer to the second question,

"If you still worked for a corporation, would you still pursue an entrepreneur's lifestyle and build your own business?"

The short answer is: Maybe.

If I still worked for a corporation, in this economy, I might be able to employ my entrepreneurial instincts inside a company. Hard times, painful conditions, often breed innovation, because the old ways don't work anymore. Maybe I'm being an idealist. Depending on the company and the top management, you may get the chance to help reinvent an existing company. That can be just as exciting and satisfying as starting your own.

On the other hand, if I were working for a company where the management was clearly going the death march route (think: newspapers who haven't come up with a new business model), I'd be the first one to create Plan B. Better to throw my lot with my own creative resources than to bet on a dying paradigm. Photo by tommy THE pariah

If you are contemplating the leap to become a solopreneur/entrepreneur, what are your biggest fears? What are you at risk of losing that you currently have? And what do you stand to gain by taking a new path? 

If you are a fellow entrepreneur, how did you make the decision to start your own gig? Leave a comment below.

Sir Ken Robinson on Talent and Passion

Ready for a humorous, entertaining and educational conversation about talent and passion?  The following video is a presentation by Sir Ken Robinson, an expert on creativity. It's over an hour long and well-worth every minute:

Notice his wonderful use of story and then articulation of the main points that lead us to new ideas on old ways of doing things (e.g., education). I also love the discussion about revolution--everything you thought was true is no longer true.  A wry commentary on Western society.

Abundance During a Recession

I've never felt abundance like I have during this recession.

It's a paradox. As my monthly income has dropped to its lowest level in years, and the sales cycle is longer than I ever imagined, I'm experiencing abundance.

Photo by *sean.

Abundance looks like this:

• Getting a gift certificate in the mail for a 30-minute massage,  from an SEO consultant I used once, several years ago.  Just in time to treat myself on my birthday. 
• Finding that the certified massage therapist is in training to do healing energy work. In return for another body to practice on, I'm getting free "energy work" for the next nine months. (BTW--if you want to get in on this and you are in the Boulder area, contact Joni Rumsey, jonilynn4 [at] msn.com. In addition to giving *great* massages, Joni is a natural healer and has a wonderfully gentle demeanor.) Photo by Perfecto Insecto
• Hearing that my sons opened up a bank account at 1stBank and that the first $50 was matched by the bank. Free money!
• Spending time with extended family at a first communion,  a high school graduation, and over a long weekend in the mountains. Meeting new people at a pot luck for the choir my husband sings in. Enjoying home-cooked dishes throughout. Bringing a big pot of fresh, sweet, buttered corn-on-the cob to share. Playing Monopoly and Boggle and miniature golf with family and enjoying every moment of it.
• Finding my favorite candy (Enstrom's Toffee), on sale at a local grocery store, at less than $5 a pound, when it normally is $19 a pound.  In the orange juice section, no less! Go figure.
• Running across an Origins store in Boulder that advertises complimentary facials. I signed up with my sister, mom, and nieces for a ladies' afternoon out. 
• Enjoying the personality and love of my cat, Yama. Our first family pet, he's doted on by everyone, to which he responds with loyalty, rich purrs, and "head butts." 
• Taking a decorative jewelry box with small compartments and turning it into a collage of my kids at different ages, as a Mother's Day gift for my mother-in-law. I had fun looking through old photos and she had fun receiving the end product. 
• Sampling beginning tai-chi at the local recreation center, for less than $9 a lesson. Doing chi gong (another form of energy work) with my mom on Sunday mornings.
• Flowers blooming in my backyard, with a wonderful fragrance that fills the air. 
• Getting help, left and right, from the participants in the Networking Naturally Program, to help improve the next version of it and build it into a thriving business. 
• Taking two-hour naps on the weekends and not feeling like I needed to do anything more than give into the urge.
• Receiving free coaching and consulting from a marketing expert over many months, as he starts up a new business to help small business owners. Again, I'm a test case as he hones his craft. 
• Connecting with my husband in lively discussions on politics, public policy, and education. 
• Having a long lunch at the perfect restaurant with my sister and mom, paid for by a gift card received last Christmas.
• Discovering that the Lululemon Athletica store in Boulder provides a free yoga class on Sunday evenings, with invited instructors each week. Photo by judepics.
• Having time with my kids on the way to school every morning, and getting their viewpoint on everything from driving (cool) to award ceremonies (not cool) to summer jobs (cool if it involves computers.) 
• Receiving a gift card for a local bookstore from a fellow coach, as a thank you for a recent referral. 
• Connecting with some great people on Twitter and finding blogs like The Inspired Writer, with gorgeous photos of flowers.

There's more, but that's plenty.

Abundance comes in many forms--in relationships, time, meaning, health, peace of mind, intellectual stimulation, expertise, and yes, money.

I'm convinced that abundance is about my state of mind--being able to see it, sometimes right in front of me, and being grateful for it. It's magical in how it appears. Recognizing abundance seems to create even more abundance. 

How are you experiencing abundance? 

Photo by The Marmot.

Wisdom from Three Cups of Tea Author

I posted on my other blog about a talk that Greg Mortenson, author of the book, Three Cups of Tea,  gave in Denver this month. It had a profound impact on me.

I wanted to share a few quotes by Mortenson, who has spent over a decade working on the ground in Pakistan and Afghanistan to build schools. His pearls of wisdom come directly from experience:

"The real enemy is ignorance. Ignorance breeds hatred."

"We have to touch poverty, smell it, experience it to help solve it. We can't be in a think tank."

"Let go and empower communities."

"If provincial governments are strong, a fragile central government doesn't matter."

"Unless girls are educated, society won't change. Education is the key."

"When your heart speaks, take good notes."

"What gives me hope? Kids."

Knowing the story of Three Cups of Tea, seeing the author speak with a rare mix of authenticity and humility, and hearing his wisdom, created a moment in time that I'll remember for a long time.

Why I Want My Sons to Be Entrepreneurs

As my sons got into the car for the 15-minute ride to school, I shared with them a secret wish: "I hope some time during your life, you become an entrepreneur."

The 16-year old, who may be doomed to be a scientist in some government lab in New Mexico or a software developer in a cubicle farm, asked me why. To which I replied,

"Being an entrepreneur makes you more grateful, creative, and resourceful. It's a meritocracy. It doesn't matter what your education is or what family you were born into. All that matters is whether you provide value in the marketplace."

I spent nearly two decades inside large companies, including those that had monopolistic roots--a large electric utility (Commonwealth Edison) and the local phone company (US West.) I know from first hand experience that going directly from school to those kind of environments had pros and cons.  Sure, I got great experience, learned to work with others, and figured out how to please my boss.

I also adopted an entitlement mindset, quashed my creativity to conform, and did my fair share of being wasteful. Did I really need to stay at a Four Seasons Hotel in Boston for a technical meeting as a twenty-something?  How could the company ask me to pay my fair share for health benefits when I was used to getting full coverage for free?  And if meetings were dull and boring, it was because I was afraid to add my two cents in to bring some aliveness to the discussion.

See what I mean? It's so easy.

Once you work for yourself, things change dramatically. I've become grateful--for my first customer and my last. I've become resourceful--figuring out how to get work done on a shoestring using interns and high school students, in a home office, with some second hand equipment. I've become more creative--to meet the needs of a marketplace that is always providing signals.

Being an entrepreneur is not only humbling. It's empowering, thrilling, scary, and satisfying, all at the same time. Not everyone is cut out for it, but if you are, don't wait another moment. Jump in now.

Photo by nationalrural

The Ties (and Memories) That Bind

I couldn't help but be drawn into a story about how a group of girls in middle America (Ames, IA) stayed connected over the course of 40 years. The story was further developed in a book, The Girls of Ames, by a Wall Street Journal reporter. 

It made me think about how my college memories are so deeply integrated with the friends I made during that time. For me, it's not only the ties that bind but the memories that bind. A few months ago, I was reminiscing with a sorority sister through Facebook. It was as if the events we talked about just happened recently.  The images are that vivid in my mind. Photo by spakattacks

I have to remind myself that I am old enough to have kids in college. I know intellectually when I step back on the campus of my alma mater,  I'm a nearly 50-year old woman. Yes, the kids look a lot different, act a lot different, and technology has changed most things about how students live these days. Yet emotionally, I'm still that serious engineering student, walking up to my boyfriend's frat house to see my sweetie or waiting outside of the English building for another of his no-shows (skipping class was my husband's specialty, just behind late night poker playing.) See what I mean?  I can see it so clearly in my mind. 

I've been invited to be one of the speakers at Northwestern University's reunion weekend in October. I can't wait to see what memories get triggered when I return....

Photo by powerbooktrance

Wisdom on Careers and Business

I was part of a business panel last week talking about "Risk, Reward, Opportunity: Navigating a Changing Marketplace." This event was sponsored by the Northwestern Club of Colorado. My fellow panelists, Chris Onan, Madie Gustafson, and Brian Baldwin, are well-known in Denver business circles.

Some nuggets of wisdom from the panel:

1. Don't burn bridges.
2. Clean up your messes.
3. When networking, don't expect that you are entitled to anyone else's time. Get to know the whole person, not just someone in their professional role. Think of it as relationship-building, not a transaction. Give first before asking for anything.
4. Where there's opportunity:  Solve problems with fresh water and  energy. Food sector. Industries that fill Baby Boomer needs--co-housing, alternatives to retirement, creating meaning. Photo by jeremyfoo
5. You don't have to have your whole life figured out. Just worry about the next step.
6. Be adaptable, flexible. Be willing to try something new.
7. Money for start-ups is still available. It's just more expensive.
8. Be intellectually honest. Accept and work with the reality of your situation, even if it's not what others want to hear.
9. Cut your expenses.
10. There's never been a better time to start a company. 
11. Be willing to take risks, to push the envelope. 
12. Be willing to move into action, even if you don't have it all figured out. Perfection is the enemy of the entrepreneur.

For those of you who attended the event, please add what you learned from the panel.

Secrets to Hiring Good People or How to Prove You'll Be A Good Fit

Fast Company has a great article, Hold the Interview, that makes a provocative claim:

When someone "interviews well" it has no correlation to how they will perform on the job.

If this is true, then employers and job seekers have been wasting a lot of time and energy with the interviewing process. Photo by magnusfranklin

The article is written by Dan Heath and Chip Heath, authors of the book, Made to Stick. Their solution to the interview problem? In their words,

"...[F]igure out whether candidates can do the job. Research has consistently shown that one of the best predictors of job performance is a work sample. If you're hiring a graphic designer, get them to design something. If you're hiring a salesperson, ask them to sell you something."

I was reminded of this tip when I read the obituary of Richard Deems, a prominent publisher who revived two well-known magazines, Cosmopolitan and Good Housekeeping, in the 1960's and 1970's. In talking about his ability to build a first rate staff, the article cites, "it was in part because he did his homework, requiring a prospective editor to turn our three or four simulated issues before hiring him or her."

Is a work sample the only way determine whether someone would make a good hire?  Someplace between "connecting in an interview" and "seeing the quality of the end product" there's another point of reference.

I was on a business panel last week talking about what's needed now in a changing marketplace. On the panel, I sat next to Brian Baldwin, a man who has started no less than 11 companies, mostly in health care. He's still chairman of Baxa Corporation, which employs over 600 people. His latest venture is running a perch farm (yes, you got that right, he raises fish), located in a small town in Indiana. (Why, Indiana, you ask?  I had the same question. I talked with Brian's wife, Ann, who said she grew up in Indiana. Always good to meet a fellow Hoosier. But, I digress.....)

Brian's answer to the hiring question? Simulate the work environment using a game. He decides whether someone will make a good hire by playing a few games of pool with them.  Because pool is a game of making choices (e.g., do I go for the ball in the corner or the one in the middle?) it reveals a player's judgment (or lack thereof) as well as her ability to think strategically, several shots ahead. One of the other panelists asked about Brian's track record in picking staff this way. Brian said new hires worked out about 75% of the time. I'd say that's better than most companies could hope for. Photo by fictures

If you are on the other side of the table, looking for a job, what does this mean for you? 

• Be prepared to show work samples that are relevant to the job that you are seeking.  If you don't have anything relevant, volunteer to do some work for free for a prospective employer, as a way to show the quality of the work that you do. Agree on a reasonable work product that is both valuable to the employer and hits the sweet spot of what you can do.

• Don't be afraid to show non-work facets of you that relate to how your brain is wired. Personal stories that illustrate typical behavior can be some of the most powerful ways to convey what you are naturally good at. Collect a few stories that you can use in conversation.

By using both of these tips, you and a prospective employer will avoid surprises down the road. It will also set you apart from most candidates who focus on talking a good game up front but don't really provide the substance that points to performance on the job.

Happy Mother's Day

As a Mother's Day gift for my mother-in-law, I took a jewelry box, with small square and rectangular compartments for rings and bracelets and slightly larger ones for necklaces, and turned it into a photo collage of my two sons. I cut out images from extra photos over the years, where part of the frame was blurry or mostly landscape or I was just too far away for a good picture. Somewhere in that 3x5 photo was the perfect smile of one of my sons or the laugh of another son or the sweet look of a child at play. My job was to capture it in this padded box, with lovely red lining.

My sons are now 13 and 16, so I had plenty of material to work from. As I reviewed my stash kept in two card files, organized year by year, a still life narrative of my kids emerged.  Stretching from newborn baby to independent teen and tween, I was given the gift of remembering.

I remembered their years as newly licensed walkers in a world of stairs and household furniture towering over them. Baby gates and vigilant parents kept them safe.

I remembered them as toddlers and pre-schoolers, riding together in makeshift kiddie trains at a local fair or playing in the backyard with the garden hose or digging in the turtle-shaped green plastic sandbox. (You know the one I'm talking about, with a lid that resembled a shell. It was a fixture in most backyards with small kids in the 90's.)

As grade-schoolers, I remembered our hikes through Colorado pine trees and occasional camping trips in more remote areas, where nature engaged them with quartz-like rocks and small beetles. 

Their first day of school photos were taken in the shadows of the aspens near the backyard patio and on the steps leading to our front door. In their faces, you can see the optimism of another year. Their backs are adorned with new backpacks, not yet dirtied with smashed up sandwiches in plastic bags and torn granola bar wrappers.

As my sons grew into middle school and high school, the mix of little boy and young man shifted, in favor of  young adult with a zest for video games and War Hammer gatherings and cheat codes. Still to come: learning to drive, getting that first summer job, and dating. 

But I get ahead of myself. Today is Mother's Day 2009. My 13-year old made me a breakfast of scrambled eggs, toast, and juice. My 16-year old remarked that he should have made lunch instead of me. Motherhood has been a privilege and an honor and a bittersweet experience, knowing that all we have is this moment. And our memories. Thanks, boys, for enriching my life and giving me the gift of motherhood.

Know Thyself

Q: What skill is most critical to your own and/or your company's success?

I came across this question on a discussion for a LinkedIn group. I wanted to share my response with readers of this blog.

A: Know thyself.

Photo by Esparta

Why?

• If you aren't aware of your own limitations, you can't tap into expertise that others could provide more easily and efficiently and joyfully.

• If you aren't aware of your gifts, where you naturally excel and get juiced, you won't be able to target your career in the right direction. You won't be able to put yourself in the right role in your company. You'll always be playing a role that doesn't quite fit.

• If you aren't aware of your own personal reactions to impersonal situations (e.g., the economy is not out to get you), you won't be able to see opportunities and work with the reality of tough situations. It will be easy to get stuck in a victim mode--reactive--instead of being proactive.

Everything else follows from awareness. With awareness comes choice.

What's a question that you've been pondering? Share it here and it may be fodder for a great blog post....

Advice on Careers and Business

A few places to look for good advice on your career or business:

• How To Hire a Career Coach from Marci Alboher's blog, Working the New Economy.  Marci draws on the advice of many coaches (I know, because I was one of them) to compile some thoughtful answers to the biggest questions around hiring a career coach. She does a nice job of covering a lot of territory in a concise article. Photo by runneralan2004

• Paul B. Brown's Toolkit column in the New York Times.  Addressing the concerns of small business, I stumbled upon this cache of great advice a couple of days ago. He covers everything from keeping the cash flowing to succession planning to the benefits of having a formal board of directors. I was searching for a blog posting I wrote several years ago, Googled my name and a few key words and came up with a Toolkit article in which Brown had quoted me, from an article I wrote several years ago and published on HR.com.  Funny how those things work.

• Risk, Reward, Opportunity: How to Navigate the Current Market Landscape. This career roundtable, on the evening of May 12 in Denver, is being hosted by the Northwestern University Club of Colorado. I'll be speaking on a panel with fellow alumni who are experienced business leaders--a serial enterpreneur who has launched 11 companies, an attorney who has played a pivotal role in shaping the cable industry, and the managing director of a local venture capital firm.  I'm usually more comfortable being the moderator for these kinds of events. (It's a lot easier to ask the questions than to answer them!) And I'm honored that I was invited to sit on the panel. If you'd like to attend, please click here to register. 

Photo by davida3

It's All In Your Perspective

I have amazing clients. One of them is "in transition," having left a job at the end of February and figuring out what's next. She sent me this epiphany while journaling about her situation:

Who would sign up for the following trip?

• Destination: Not disclosed
• How long? Undetermined
• Cost? We’ll find out as we go
• Guaranteed:

• Ups and downs, fun and scary
• Meet great characters along the way
• Learn a lot about yourself
• Fascinating sights
• A great adventure

The people who sign up for this trip are brave, courageous, spirited, creative and sure that life will always steer them straight. These people have great inner guidance systems so that they never get lost (or not for long anyhow). These are folks willing to jump in with both feet and relish the adventure of it all. Each day is filled with amazing experiences and tales to be told.

This IS the trip I’ve signed up for! Not only that, I’ve been specifically chosen to be on this trip, a trip not everyone gets to go on. It’s the greatest “self-help” and consciousness building course ever designed

God is funding this trip, planning the itinerary and guiding me toward the destination. All I have to do is stay engaged and enjoy the ride! Perfect!

This is the difference between creating something wonderful and accepting whatever drops in your lap.

What's your perspective about the place you are in right now? And if you don't like that perspective, what's the new perspective that you want to take for an hour, a day, or even a week? 

Photo by suchitra prints

Digital Immigrants: Will You Move Forward or Be Left Behind?

The wonderful thing about starting a new venture is that you don't know where it will take you.

For over a year now, I've been researching and trying out social media--tools for the 21st century for doing business, deepening friendships, and finding new opportunities. My initial research was around how to use the tools to turn an idea into sustainable, scalable movement, as part of the model for A Bigger Voice.

A funny thing happened. As I learned more about social media, I became worried, not for myself, but for other people my age  and older. Really accomplished people--CEOs, small business owners, authors, speakers, savvy CFOs.  These are people with wisdom and experience. They are also digital immigrants--individuals over the age of 35 (some well over the age of 35) who moved into the Internet age after they became an adult. They know how things were done before the world became digitized. Photo by aNantaB

What I can see coming, more clearly each day, is that as the digital natives move into places of power in government, business, and academic institutions, they will have their way of doing things. And it will be influenced by their use of social media.

Today, digital immigrants who can't meet digital natives on their terms don't fully feel the consequences (although they do when these digital natives are also consumers.)  The DI generation still populates the top of the hierarchies in society's most influential organizations.

This will change in five years. Or seven. Or three.

Those digital immigrants who get on board with social media and the underlying principles (e.g., transparency, personalization, listening to the community) will be the ones who get the business deals, job offers, and wild opportunities. Those who don't will miss out. Big time. Photo by Per Ola Wiberg

A Wall Street Journal article about the obsolescence of GM's board of directors hints at the future.  Most of the board members are former CEOs who haven't run a company in years, sometimes over a decade. Only one is currently an active CEO, running a company. Such a board becomes out of sync with what's happening in the marketplace quickly. I suspect they were advising Rick Wagoner based on an old base of knowledge, that would have done just fine a decade ago. A lot has happened in 10 years.

If you are over the age of thirty-five, are you adapting to the way the world is going? Or will you be left behind? 

My mantra for the last few months, while the world as we knew it slips away rapidly, has been "Reinvent to Be Relevant."  This applies to all of us but as I type this post, it particularly applies to digital immigrants.

P.S. Before publishing this post, I read it to my husband, who is 52 years old, and probably one of the most non-technical, non-social media people I know. He uses email and reads blogs but that's about it. He reminds me that it's not "either/or" but rather "both/and." I heartily agree.  Digital immigrants need to add to their toolkit, instead of throwing the old one out and starting all over.

I Want to Work for Zappos

I want to work for Zappos. I thought I was unemployable after being a solopreneur/entrepreneur for the last six years. After listening to this keynote at the SXSW conference by Tony Hsieh, CEO of Zappos, I'm reconsidering. Okay, not really. I still love being on my own. But IF I ever went back to being an employee, one of the first companies I would look at is Zappos.

Read, listen, and watch to understand why:

Slides for Tony Hsieh's keynote

Audio of Tony Hsieh's keynote

Video Highlights of Tony Hsieh's keynote:

Part 1

Part 2

Hsieh is brilliant, absolutely brilliant.

If you are a business owner, take a look at ZapposInsights, which is designed to share what Zappos has done right (and wrong) to help other businesses prosper. Membership is $39.95 per month.

Why Keeping Your Hands Busy Helps Your Mind

In working with teams, I see how individuals are so different from each other, and how those differences are perceived as good or bad.

I sometimes hear about "the doodler," the person who can't stop themselves from drawing and doodling during meetings. One person told me that they literally have to sit on their hands in order to "fit in" with what's expected at a meeting.

Now there's news that doodling is a good thing. Both National Public Radio and Time magazine report that doodling helps keep your brain on task, helping you from checking out completely when faced with a somewhat boring environment (did I say staff meeting?)  This also fits with what my colleague Robert Rasmussen espouses in working with Lego Serious Play. He encourages workshop participants to "fiddle" with the Lego bricks while listening to his instructions, as it prevents day dreaming.

All of this leads me back to whole brain thinking--engaging both right brain and left brain to create better results.

Are you a doodler? And if so, what do you see as the benefits?

Photo by peregrine blue